youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
