I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize