dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
