Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
