You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
