he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
