I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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