dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
two words...techno handjob
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
