just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
