Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
