Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize