Pants 0. Shit 1.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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