You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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