Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Randomize
