Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
