Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
