So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Randomize
