I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Randomize
