are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
