I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Randomize
