i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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