You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
