Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
