I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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