We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
