also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
