you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
