Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
