At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize