Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
