For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
