I wannas sexs uuuuu
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize
