dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Let's get the cat blown out
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
