Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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