I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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