I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
