is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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