I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
