Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
