shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
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