after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize