i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Randomize
