I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
