Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm sobbing to NWA
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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