i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize