i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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