all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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