i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
