The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
