He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
