Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Randomize
