she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
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